Where Have You Gone...

I couldn't fall back to sleep after he left this morning. I couldn't explain why I felt so uncomfortable.so strange and restless.so inexplicably empty.
I wonder could it be, that I somehow felt her leaving.that I knew when she was gone.
even if I couldn't have said at the time that was what it was.
I'm too alone.I damage myself like this.
blinking, and seeing her face.
looking down at my hands...we had the same hands. she was proud of her hands.
as she lay there speechless, I massaged cream into them. wondering what she would say if she could use her voice.
her voice is gone.I will only hear it in my head now.with the soft welsh lilt she had seemingly re-developed recently.
She, is gone.

how can she just be gone.

she would probably curse me for calling her she so many times...
as ..my Grandmother would say "She, is the cats mother"